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Gone in a puff of smoke...

30/7/2017

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I have just been reading through some old books of my fathers. One of his favourite authors was Dornford Yates who wrote comedy and thrillers in the 1930’s and 40’s.

In the story I am reading set in 1938, the hero is twenty-two years old, rowed for Oxford so is the strong muscular type, is described as tall dark and handsome and is well off enough to drive a fantastic sports roadster. Two chapters in, he is in France on an extended touring holiday and has teamed up and fallen in love with a beautiful young grey-eyed woman whom he met on the boat from Dover, but she turns out to be a notorious jewel thief who he will obviously save from her sins and her deadly underworld colleagues who are out to kill her.

Although quite tame by today’s standards the book was reading well and I had fully identified myself with the main character, until in one romantic scene our hero lights up a pipe and covers both he and his lover with a cloud of smoke! ‘What a loser’ instantly came into my mind as I read this, and I now dislike the chap so much I am loathe to bother finishing the book.

Now, back in the 30’s and 40’s every young man would have smoked a pipe and have been seen to be cool for doing so, and I even tried a pipe when I was in my twenties. So as an ex-smoker how have I become so anti-smoking and especially anti-pipe that I can’t bear to associate myself with such a character to this extent? All I can think of is stinky breath, that awful tobacco staining on his hands and clothes, the putrid smell of the smoke and the coughing and wheezing that will no doubt ensue.

The same is beginning to happen where heroes and booze is concerned. Anything I read or watch where the hero picks up a drink instantly makes me consider him weak and dependent on ‘Dutch courage’ to cope with life. This is even true of characters like James Bond who probably most males would like to be identified with at some stage in their life, I know I did. But not anymore, all I think of is the hangover he is going to have, the fact he will be dying for more than one drink, the fact he will be planning his life around booze, and the fact his senses will be massively impaired the more he drinks which is useless for any sort of hero!

I am afraid to say that for me at least, all these ‘loser’ hero types have simply gone up in a puff of smoke!
 

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The most unhelpful report EVER!

28/7/2017

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This highly broadcasted piece of spurious research has incensed me. I am normally unaffected when reading reports such as this, but the fact the Press is heralding the news so grandly, and the weak and insipid response from Drinkaware has driven me to write this blog.

Anyone looking to quit alcohol will see this latest news as yet another reason to either put off their decision to quit or to justify trying to moderate their drinking instead. I know that when I was an alcoholic, I would have lauded this report to my wife and shouted with joy at the inherent justification to carry on getting smashed every day. That voice in our head that tries to justify each drink we crave will be having a field day with this one. ‘Why give up’ it will say, ‘drinking is actually good for you!’  So, is the report really saying we should drink to be healthy?

I have read some highly regarded academic comment on this report and can summarise the following:

Four years ago, 800 or so people were asked how much they drank and if they had diabetes. Four years later they were asked if they had diabetes. The conclusion - those that said they drank were less likely to have or to get diabetes.

If you had asked me the same questions four years ago I would have admitted to drinking (but lied about how much I drank and probably admitted to five glasses of wine per day, not fifteen!) I would also have confirmed that I had type 2 diabetes. Now when asked four years later if I have diabetes, the answer is no! Conclusion – drinking can get rid of diabetes! The fact that in the interim I quit alcohol completely is not taken into consideration and in this study the participants current drinking habits were not even questioned. In other words, the report is appallingly researched and therefore meaningless.

I only have my own story to go by and the fact that I did resolve my type 2 diabetes after quitting alcohol and I am now totally free of that disease. Whether this is because of all the weight I lost through having quit or not is by the by, the fact is, I am now incredibly fit and healthy. I also have a new liver which IS a result of having quit alcohol, and a healthier heart, kidneys, and everything else besides.

So please do not be led astray by misleading reports such as this, you know alcohol is creating misery and stress in your life. Quit now and share the same wonderful life I have. You can read more about me and my story at www.idontdrink.net
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The gift of time

25/7/2017

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The BBC report on a new study today that has found that Time, not material goods, ‘raises happiness’.

The nub of the study was to give the same amount of money to two sets of people, one group of whom could buy goods such as wine, a treat etc., and the other had to spend the money on someone else doing chores which resulted in them having more time for themselves. The results concluded that having more time for yourself was far more satisfying than having more ‘things’ in life.

When you quit alcohol, you will find you have far more time for yourself and for others and yes, it is massively satisfying. Think of the time you spend planning your day so that you can fit drinking time into it. Think of the time you spend worrying whether you have enough booze in the fridge or the drinks cabinet. Think of the time you spend worrying about whether you drink too much and worrying that others might think that of you too. Think of how much time you spend telling yourself you will cut down or quit alcohol because you know it isn’t doing you any good and is ruining the quality of your life. Think of the time you spend lying to yourself that you need that next drink to be able to cope with what life throws at you.

Now think of the time you find it hard to commit to others because drink gets in the way. Think of the amount of times you have said ‘in a minute’ to someone because you are too busy finishing your drink. Think of the amount of time spent feeling like shit because you have had too much to drink. Think of the amount of lost time in your life because you can’t remember what the hell it was you said or did when you were drunk.
Now think of the less time you will have to enjoy life because drink will kill you far earlier than if you never touched the bloody stuff again. Think of the happy times you can have with those you love and who love you because you will have time for them and not for some damned chemical that controls you.

There is never a better time to quit alcohol than now. In the grand scheme of things, we humans aren’t given much time to live, why waste any of that time when I can hand on heart tell you that life after alcohol is truly fantastic. Give yourself the gift of time – quit alcohol now.

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Then and now - the concert!

11/7/2017

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Before attending the concert this weekend, I last went to the annual Leeds Castle (in Kent) concert spectacular about eight years ago. Of course, at that time I was a heavy drinker and I don’t remember having enjoyed the concert that much.

For one thing, the concert starts in the mid-afternoon and goes on until about 11.00 p.m. As I had promised to drive there on the basis my wife would drive home, I was keen to get there as early as possible so I could have a drink. I remember however, that my wife only wanted to arrive for the main event which started at 7.30 p.m. so that meant a whole afternoon with no booze! It being a Saturday I would normally start drinking at lunchtime so I was already quite frustrated by the time we arrived and finally sat down for our picnic. You probably recognise that ‘want one – can’t have one’ stressful feeling you get in situations like this, especially when you know you will be drinking later that day. Being surrounded by 12,000 other picnickers you are also quite on show at these events, so sitting with someone who is not drinking and getting smashed and making an exhibition of yourself is not done, so I had to temper what I was drinking. It was also blatantly obvious to my wife how much I was consuming as at home I would normally be able to secrete some wine away somewhere and top up my glass without her knowing.   I think I had one bottle of wine and some cider throughout the whole evening which was quite tame for me. I do remember spilling lots of drink. For some reason, I always had to have a glass of something alcoholic in my hand, I simply couldn’t put the glass down and ignore it. Waving flags and trying to applaud the performers tends to lead to spilled wine!  

Trying to think back now, I can’t remember what we actually saw on stage that night or how ‘spectacular’ the event was, but I do remember it taking about an hour to get out of the car park, there being so many people, and about another hour to drive home. As those of you who drink will know, all that time I was dying for yet another drink as what I had already consumed was never quite enough, and the evening not being quite over, that nagging ‘just one more’ voice was in my head. I can even remember the impatience and angst I felt sitting in the car and knowing my drinking time was being eaten up by the queues of other cars. So of course, by the time we got home it was already gone 1.00 a.m. and although time for bed, I am sure I managed to swallow at least one more glass of wine just for the hell of it, and to satisfy that agonising craving.

This time we did arrive early it being a wonderful hot day, and as I was driving both to and from the concert I was totally in charge. As well as some nice quiche and salad by way of food, to drink we had bought some ‘summer sunshine’ non-alcoholic soda from Waitrose which was delicious, and some cans of Limonada. Drinking this out of champagne glasses felt very posh and we sat in our seats near to the stage ready to enjoy the evening show and the prelude given by the RAF brass band. I had decided this time to pay the extra ten pounds each for seats as opposed to fighting for space with the rest of the 12,000 people, and I justified the additional expense on the basis that we would be saving all of that and much more by my not drinking.

And I have to honestly say, this was the most enjoyable musical event I have ever been to. The London Philharmonic Orchestra played there heart out, there were two incredible opera singers, fireworks, the RAF brass band, the Royal Artillery firing their guns during the 1812 overture, yet more fireworks, and even a Spitfire flypast whilst the orchestra played the music from the Battle of Britain!

I was acutely aware just how focused on the event I was able to be this time, without the concern of what and how much I was drinking, without the constant looking at my watch and thinking will the wine I have left be enough to last the evening, without looking enviously at others near me with champagne and brandy, worrying that I might be getting too pissed which would annoy my wife, and in fact not caring about or being dictated to by booze at all.
Simply enjoying the experience for what it was – not what my addiction to alcohol was trying to make it.

Once again it looked like it would take forever to get out of the car park so instead we stayed by the stage and had a relaxed coffee, listened to some taped music the organisers had put on, and watched the crowds fight their way out. We saw lots of drunks falling around which was amusing, we watched and admired the moon which was full that evening and quite majestic as it shone its light over the magnificent castle, and we finally got home at 1.00 a.m. as before, but this time relaxed and content. We went to bed having had a wonderful and most memorable evening, and I have already booked our seats for next year.

Alcohol was always in the way in my life, and it stopped me truly appreciating what was there in front of me. I am so deep down glad I have escaped from that trap into which it is so easy to fall.

Think about a recent event you have been to, and try and imagine how that would have differed if alcohol wasn’t part of your life and if the pressure of your next drink wasn’t driving your actions, feelings, and thought processes. I know that can be hard to do and that is why I wrote ‘One Less for the Road’, to help you understand what life really is like without booze, from someone who has been there and who won’t ever be going there again thankyou.     


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Dreams, Drink and making a complete mess of the Brain!

9/7/2017

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This Thursday I went to two very different events that stimulated me to think about alcohol.

The first was the famous play ‘Lettice and Lovage’ starring Felicity Kendal (who I have always wanted to see in person having been an avid fan of the ‘Good Life’ - and she is even tinier than I had imagined, and Maureen Lipman, another brilliant actress who normally plays Jewish matriarch roles. In one scene, they both get drunk (Maureen’s character supposedly for the first time) and they both act at getting steadily more inebriated extremely well. As the alcohol has its effect, Maureen loses her rigid façade and starts to tell all sorts of home truths – and not all to her own advantage! As she fills her glass once more you could feel the audience wishing – no more, no more! It was great fun, but unlike real life, the lights went off and when they came back on it was a completely new scene and both ladies were totally sober.
In the evening we went to the Royal Institute for an interesting lecture on dreams, followed by a ‘mid-summer night’ event situated throughout the historic building, and based on dreams, our perceptions and interpretations of reality. There were all sorts of experiments and science demonstrations to get involved in, and I particularly liked the ones aimed at confusing the senses. For example, you could wear headphones that swapped your hearing so you heard someone talking to you on your right hand side with your left ear, glasses that reversed your vision or made you see upside down, tricks you could do with your hands so that you believed you had two noses or that made you move the wrong fingers when prompted, and many more. It struck me how easy it is to confuse the brain even if you know what you are seeing and doing is a trick. There was another exhibit where you could try drinks of different colours and rank these by sweetness. Everyone put the red drink as sweeter than the blue. In fact, all the drinks were plain lemonade and it was just how your brain is programmed to expect richer colours to be sweeter that led to the confusion. It made me think of how alcohol confuses the brain, and how our brains are programmed by advertising to believe that alcohol makes you relax, and is somehow good for you and relieves stress. Sometimes you need to stand back and look at what is really happening when you have a drink. What actually is this stuff you are drinking and why are you doing it? What is the massive hold this chemical has over you and how did things get so bad? And, why is it sometimes so hard to imagine life without this stuff?
As for the dream lecture, apparently we dream all night long, not just when we have rapid eye movement (REM), and much of our dreaming is our brain sorting out and compartmentalising what has gone on that day. I know I have much nicer dreams now I don’t drink, I never have nightmares and of course I sleep much better. Perhaps the huge lack of stress in my life makes it easier for my brain to sort out the day’s events. I would have liked to ask the speaker about alcohol and dreams but there were too many other questions being asked, and things were getting somewhat bizarre with people wanting to talk about their dogs and cats dreaming, out of body experiences, dream predictions of the future and the like. And I could tell that some of these people had been taking unfair advantage of the free wine prior to the lecture starting!

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Many thanks to Damien Hirst

3/7/2017

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As part of my street lecture series for July, here I am opposite Lloyd’s of London making good use of the Damien Hirst sculpture (called ‘Temple’) to demonstrate the impact of alcohol on the liver. Needless to say the audience was somewhat thin on the ground, everyone being either in a pub or a wine bar celebrating the fact it was a Monday.
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I finished the lecture by pointing out the somewhat disappointing impact of drink on the male member.

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Someone kindly paid for this sculpture to be displayed as part of a host of thought provoking artworks being introduced to educate and inform the generally considered ‘philistine’ members of the insurance community. The final entry I spotted in a tree, (called 'Never has there been such urgency, or The eloquent and the Gaga') is perhaps supposed to represent the frustration felt by an insurance broker after having been sacked for drunkenness – I call it ‘Toys out’o pram’.

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You can view these and many more similar artworks for yourself in the square mile, but be quick, the refuse men are only on holiday for another two weeks!

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