I don't drink
Listening to some drunks on the train home last night, as they shouted into their phones what they had been up to, it made me think of all the expressions we use to describe getting pissed. Very few of them are nice and I have spared you the expletives of which there are far too many to name. It struck me how strange it would sound to a visitor from another planet who had never encountered a drinking culture if we were to say 'let's go out and get hammered and legless.' In the end the crowd in my carriage were too loud and abusive and so for the sake of my wife we changed carriages. I resent having to move because of other people's behaviour but then I haven't always been perfect. There were times when my brother and I were drunk on our commute home from work and I would have absolutely hated to be in the same carriage - of course at the time I thought I was hilarious.